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Posts Tagged ‘journal’

Taking Back Tuesdays: 3 years ago..

January 19, 2016 Leave a comment

I was thinking of what to post this week. So I tried reading back some of my post. I have my own TBT and I started it 3 years ago. I was in excitement those days. I was soon be off to Bunbury Australia.

Sometimes, you have been blessed to do what other people dreams of doing. It wasn’t my dream to go out of the country and work and settle. I remembered one of my College professor asking me if I have plans to go abroad once I finish my degree. That time I said to her, I don’t intend on going somewhere else. The thought of leaving people behind is terrifying. If in case I don’t know someone in that foreign place, I don’t have any idea on what to do, worse, how to live my life.

I am living in someone else’s dream. I keep telling people this. It was also not my dream to become a chef. Well I have lots of dream. I wanted to do a lot of things. But during my College days, I chose to be a Culinary Arts Major. People don’t know that I only learned how to cook and such during College. Being a girl, I am expected to know how to cook. But then again, I cannot even prepare a simple dish. Anyway, since I started working, I basically started out as a cook then got my qualification to be a chef during my internship. I am fortunate that I earn a decent amount and love what I do. I always think that I am living someone’s dream so might as well make the most out of it.

It will work out, eventually. A friend asked me if I want to try applying for Internship in US. It didn’t work out for us. Then again, she found an alternative place, Australia. The hardest part is the decision. I asked people about it as well as ask my mom. She didn’t agree on me living alone in a foreign place wherein we don’t even have a relative. It’s such a pain asking for her permission as well as financial support for my plan. My friend talked to her and finally she agreed. After a year, I decided to stay here. She didn’t want me to go back. But I pursued her into letting me go. I used up all my savings and paid for everything. I sorted out my application and such. And here I am now, living solo happy and contented.

So what have you been doing 3 years ago?

Butterfly Effect: “Hard work pays off afterall”

November 6, 2015 Leave a comment

So it seems that I’ve been posting once every 5- 6 months. Well, since work and Uni I’ve been preoccupied. The only thing stopping me from posting is the fact that I want to keep away from people. I think I’ve grown to the point I had reached the time of blogging yet being fully private.

Since I last posted, I’m not sure if I said that I am working on my previous company. Same company, same work. But since then, I have come to love my career more. I had experienced a lot of mishaps at work these previous months. Ups and downs. But all my supervisors say never to let those things come up to me. Maybe suck it in then spit it out. I’ve heard a few good compliments from everyone about my work as well as my attitude. Sometimes I just feel that I am the ‘ teacher’s pet’ of everyone. I don’t know. I just work my butt off, do better things and be myself. But the feeling of everyone talking behind my back seems to be a big deal for me.

I used to remember that during my work in Bunbury, my previous Head Chef said that I bring positivity and happiness to the group and that I bring us all together. I am not that talented into making new dishes nor my skills were that fully developed. I was still a budding chef at least here in Australia.

Sometime last October, I was my current Head Chef to fill up my student evaluation form. He wrote down that I am positive and reliable. I was so happy and overwhelmed with his comment. He even said that I contributed positive things to the group these past few months. I try to remember what I actually did to make him say that. I have been working hard and trying to patch things with everybody even though I have problems most of the time, I try not to get those people into my nerves. hehe. I try to elongate more my temper with them. After our team was changed, or at least some took off the company so they had to hire new ones, we started to build new and better working relationships. We support each other as to keep the other from having a hard time for the next shift. Makes sense?

My supervisors have been recommending me to do some shifts on other properties of our company. I had worked on that branch before and he said that I was requested by the chefs. I overheard their  CDP/ Sous Chef asking wait staff how was I on my first day working back there. It was busier nowadays there than when I worked there last July. Well, they said everything went well and I am good on what I am doing. The other day, I was surprised. I thought our Executive chef is watching me while I work. Then he leaned beside me and said that I will be a part of the team who will prepare the Christmas party food for the General Managers. I was so overwhelmed and then he said it was on December 11. And I probably be in Bunbury, WA that time, so I had to turn down his proposal. I was in regret that I thought of cancelling my flight and hotel reservations for the trip. I thought that this is my chance to cook for Executives of the company and my chance to prove that I can work in that Luxury property of the company. A chance slipped just like that. I just turned into positive thoughts of me having other chance or next time for a similar task.

Before that, my Executive Chef asked me of my plans after I finish my Degree. Well as of now, I am uncertain. I am still trying to figure out what work would I do after. He said the company is open for some position I wanted, at least based on my credentials and company history of course. I don’t know what he knows about how I work but based from other people, I know they are talking and chatting most of the time of what is happening and about us, their staff. I am not trying to brag about my achievements, well I don’t really have it. lol. I am just saying that “HARD WORK PAYS OFF AFTERALL.” 🙂

Life lessons I learned growing up (A Year Wiser?)

May 17, 2015 Leave a comment

In my Twenty six years of existence, I’ve passed my quarter life crisis. I’ve been to places. I’ve been with different kinds of people. Yet I still have to learn lots of things about life.

Life is an ocean (Photo by Hannah Nacis)

Life is an ocean (Photo by Hannah Nacis)

  1. Not Everything is about you.

It may seem that whenever you do things, it is just for you. Ever wonder how people get affected by your decisions and doings?

  1. Time flies fast, so as your life.

One moment you’re still with your family. Then you wake up and boom, “I’m alone.”

  1. It’s normal to feel afraid of taking risk.

Who isn’t afraid to take risk? Even the toughest person feels frightened you know. You are just afraid because it will be out of your comfort zone. You wouldn’t know how it will turn out unless you try right.

  1. Making mistake is part of life. So as regrets.

Less expectations, less disappointments, less mistakes? I don’t think so. When you fail on something, that’s when you start learning. It is okay to regret that something. But by the end of the day, you learned something.

  1. Tough times come when you least expect it.

When everything seems right, something is wrong. Yes there will always be a ‘something’ that will rock your world. Maybe you can’t handle it now, but you’ll just laugh it off later.

  1. It’s not childish to cry and seek for help.

When everything is out of place, it is okay to cry in a corner or better with someone. It is alright to ask for help during those times. Just don’t forget to say thank you afterwards.

  1. Life has four seasons.

Enough said.

  1. Money can’t buy happiness, but sometimes it can.

No one can buy your happiness, but they can buy something that will lead to it right. Like a simple flower. Or maybe… a house. 😛

  1. It’s never too late to try new things.

Learning doesn’t stop after you finish Uni. You can still go out and try other things. Play another instrument. Paint. Drive a car, etc.

  1. Life is an endless adventure.

Whether you attained happiness, your life doesn’t stop there. Definitely you still seek for other things or other people that will make you happier and content in life.

Happy Nostalgic Christmas

December 25, 2014 Leave a comment

Sorry if I hadn’t posted anything for my blog’s anniversary last December 20. To make it up to my readers, I am posting this blog on Christmas day.

Today, everyone is either staying at home with their family while others spend it away from home, thus, me spending it here in Melbourne. It is my second year of Christmas away from home. It’s my first time spending it with a S.O. Most of the time I just stay at home with my family and relatives just come over our house to celebrate.

Three years ago, I started an oil painting, Christmas themed. But the sad truth was that I didn’t get to finish it, not even half of it. Since I started doing my art again here, I will try to recreate that unfinished master piece in watercolor. I haven’t tried doing something on my own again, meaning without me copying others’ work. I tried once but I just failed ’cause I couldn’t do it in Oil Paint. Anyway, I feel inspired into doing another painting soon.

I’m celebrating my Christmas with my boyfriend and his family. I remembered my first stay here, we were just friends back then but his dad even told me to spend this day with them. Spending it away from home makes me feel homesick of course. He (bf) said to me all he can do is stay with me this day just to fill up that empty space. His family is my family here. He is my family. 🙂 I’ve been waiting for so long to feel this way. It is my first time to feel this kind of love, unconditional love. Yes I am a spoiled girlfriend, he gave me lots of love (and gifts). hehehee.. ^_^

Christmas Decors in Dandenong

Christmas day is one day where you feel happy and sad at the same time. You feel joyful and festive with everyone, but feel nostalgic about things. I do. I still remembered that year where Christmas was spent differently. Two years ago is one of the best Christmas that our family had. My cousins from other countries went home and all came to spend it with us. It is my first time seeing our family so happy on Christmas day. I didn’t know that it’ll happen that year. it was my last Christmas with them and I’m glad that we spent it so joyful. Oh well, I just miss them.

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL.

Regards,

Hannah 🙂

Quick Update: My Literary and Art Works, Uni, Work and Life

November 20, 2014 Leave a comment

Okay! I haven’t been blogging these past weeks. I was so caught up with things in uni and in life. I haven’t really watched any series nor have a read a book and watched a new movie. I have a lot of things on my mind. I am “happily distracted” as what my mister said.

I had a lot of term papers to pass last Oct until first week of November. Every time I’m off Uni, I am working. When I have spare days, I usually spend it with my mister somewhere quiet or outside the city. Yes! It wasn’t long ago when my mister and I got together, thus, official couple. He became my travel, gaming, photography and eating buddy (lol). We formed a very good foundation for our relationship as a couple, being best friends. 🙂

Anyway, I had been writing stories, poems and songs (yet I still don’t have melodies). Also, I have a lot of art projects in mind. I am inspired nowadays that I want to try out a lot of things yet I need space to do and store my art. Hopefully I can do these when my roommate leaves the apartment and I can have the room to myself. 🙂

I just need to sort all my plans and projects then I can start posting here and on my other accounts as well.

All I can say is that I am happy and contented here now in Melbourne. I had gone through a lot of hardships last year in which I learned to be stronger and tougher. I think I really deserve to be happy and fulfilled here. Christmas is fast approaching and if people will ask me what I want as a gift, I couldn’t ask for more. Everything and everyone is a blessing to me.

Sincerely,

Hannah

P.S. Or you can just give me art materials. or 3ds games. lol 😛

“Lost in music” : Begin Again (Semi movie review)

September 16, 2014 1 comment

“Begin” (Lomodoubles with Teo Esguerra : Lomo Xpro 100)

I just finished watching the movie “Begin Again” (Keira Knightly, Mark Ruffalo, Adam Levine) and I was totally amazed with it.

In the movie, Adam made a song that made Keira realize what he did. Later, Keira sends back a message to Adam thru a song voice message. Things got emotional between them and a song which Keira wrote and Adam sang became a perfect ending to the movie. (Ooopps sorry spoiler!).

Thinking that this movie might be just another Love story, I was not prepared. This is a good movie especially if you’re into Music and of course Adam Levine. Jk. But yeah mostly music. Be inspired to write songs and melodies. Pick up a pen and paper and your guitar. I don’t know with other people but after watching the movie, I totally appreciated more the meaning of the movie’s soundtrack, “Lost Stars.” It was such a good song that it was the reason I watched the movie. Hearing it sung in the movie melt my heart.

Most of my friends know that I love music. I am not good at playing musical instruments neither am I a songwriter. But thru music, I can express my feelings. Listening to what I usually hear whenever I’m sad, angry or happy, is a way you can get to know me better. Watching me enjoy my favorite bands live in a gig or concert is really enticing to the eyes. Letting me play a guitar is me showing you my vulnerability.

Throughout these years, I can easily connect with people thru music. Just a pop of question regarding their favorite song or artist is a way for me to start a conversation. Thru this, I can understand a person more. Hearing their type of music lets me know what their message or hidden emotions are.

Nowadays, music is one of my medium into knowing a great person, a special friend. At times when I just don’t want to say my feelings, I just send him hints thru my music. I just have no guts to tell someone what I am feeling exactly. I am scared, too afraid of things. Somehow I find the right songs for my message. Whew. Same goes with him. He doesn’t need to tell me details. He just picks a song for me to hear. One of these days, I can see us sitting down and playing songs, jamming. Him playing the guitar and me singing with another guitar. Just enjoying each others’ company thru music.

Begin Again : 5 Thumbs Up

My happiness is my choice

September 15, 2014 Leave a comment

It was such a busy day for me today Monday. I had Uni in the morning and work in the afternoon ’til the evening. I’ve been trying to blog lately. I really miss telling my story and others as well. I find it hard at times to find a topic to discuss. I guess I’m not that keen to post anything about movies, books, places and other things besides my personal life.

I told you a lot of times that reading my blog is like me inviting you to know me. I think nowadays I’m just emotional over things. I’m too overwhelmed of things and people as well. I passed by the phase of circle of confusion wherein I literally had a headache and emotional stress. Now, I am happier. I get to smile and laugh without thinking of other things and people’s feelings. Just thinking of my own happiness for now.

I remember in one of my favorite movie (Tada Kimi Wo Aishiteru) someone said, “You hold someone else’s happiness.” I think this is true for most people. Without you knowing it, you are someone’s happiness as well as sadness. I was. I am.

I wouldn’t elaborate on the sadness of things, I’ve done that in my previous posts. All I can share tonight is my happiness. I am happy on how are things now. Words and feelings have been expressed. It is clearer now. My phase of confusion is gone. I don’t know if God heard my prayers of asking for peace of mind. But I am happy. We are happy. 🙂